Seatmate ko si Ada mula  grade four hanggang grade six.  Walang kinalaman ang guhit ng palad dito. Ganun kasi ang prevailing logic sa mga teachers nung panahong yon: pag magkalapit ang height niyo, most likely ay magkatabi rin kayo sa upuan.  Pero di tulad ng ilan sa aking mga naging seatmates,  special si Ada.

Una kasi, hindi ako nagka-crush sa kanya, na comforting sa maraming pagkakataon kasi pwede kaming magkita araw-araw pag may pasok  at kaya naming maging normal sa isa’t-isa.  Ibig sabihin, walang  awkward at  torpe moments, hindi ko kailangang magpa-cute, hindi ko kailangang magbuhol ng dila, tumingin sa sapatos at di kumilos na parang rebulto pag siya ay nasa tabi ko, hindi ko kailangang  ma-devastate at ma-heart broken maghapon kapag hindi niya ako pinansin.  Yung simpleng seatmate lang ay nagbibigay sa amin ng privilege para mag-asaran at magkulitan hanggang gusto namin, at sa huli ay nakatitiyak pa rin kaming dalawa na kapwa kaming  okay olrayt.

Pangalawa, ang bait-bait ni Ada. Parati niya akong bibigyan ng  1/4, 1/2, 1 page na papel, bolpen pag may quiz, at as usual, nawalan na naman ako ng supply.  Parati siyang nakangiti (liban na lang pag inaasar ko). Hindi siya nagsusungit. Hindi siya nagbabaon ng kuko sa braso at tagiliran tulad ng ginagawa ni ____ kay ____. At sakaling utusan siya ni Madam Petines na maglista ng mga noisy sa klase, confident ako, hindi masasama ang pangalan ko dun.

Kaya naman nung nag-bertdey siya nung 1986, nag-effort talaga ako na gawan siya ng personalized gift. Nag-drawing ako sa isang illustration board. Di ko na matandaan kung anong dinrowing ko noon, basta, sa bertdey niyang yun, standout ang gift ko kasi ako ang gumawa nito.

Nung graduation day namin, same year, matapos ang ceremony, lumapit si Ada sa akin at nag-abot ng regalo. Puzzle. Yung kulay dilaw na may iba’t-ibang shapes tapos aayusin mo para magawa yung iba’t-ibang patterns? Yun ang naging libangan ko nung summer ng 1986. Kako, sa first day ng high school namin, magyayabang ako kay Ada at ide-demo ko sa kanya na kaya ko nang i-solve ang lahat ng patterns ng puzzle.

Ang hindi ko alam, yung graduation day na ang huling pagkikita namin. Lumipat kasi sila sa Manila at doon na siya nag-aral. Wala man lang akong picture niya para maalala ang hilatsa ng pagmumukha niya (ang mga pictures sa ibaba ay bigay na lang niya last year).

Tinago ko yung gift niyang yun hanggang mag-college ako. Kaya lang nung nagtrabaho na ako sa Manila ay nakialam sa mga gamit ko ang aking mga pamangkin at nawala na ng tuluyan yung puzzle na yun.

Sa internet na lang uli kami nag-reunite ni Ada, salamat sa google.

Ang sabi niya nawala na rin yung drawing na niregalo ko sa kanya nang huli silang lumipat ng bahay matapos siyang mag-asawa.

Gusto ko siyang pagalitan dahil napaka-careless niya, eh kaso ako man naging careless. Kaya kwits na kami.

Happy birthday seatmate! It’s  good to have reunited with you again.

Si Ada nung grade 6. Ang nginingitian niya ay si EH na noon
ay tumatambling at nagpapa-cute sa gate ng kumbento.
Tatambling lang at magpapa-cute si EH sa babaeng kras niya.

Kasama si Ada sa mga elite students ng St. Joseph na nagpi-piano lesson.
At dahil mga madre ang nagtuturo sa kanila, guaranteed sila noon
na mapupunta sila sa langit pag dating ng Judgment Day.
Sila rin ang unang ililigtas pag lumindol o nagkasunog.

Kita ninyo, nasa lupa pa lang ay palagi na siyang binibigyan ng role
na anghel pag Easter Sunday.  What more pag nasa langit na yang isang yan?

Kasama sa perks ng pagiging piano student at anghel sa Easter Sunday
ang magpa-picture sa adviser pag may Christmas party.
Ako ang nag-lettering ng nasa board. Dine-deligate lang nila ako
sa mga trabahong pang-wallpaper.

]]> http://zerogravity.lisondra.net/seatmate/feed/ 3 http://zerogravity.lisondra.net/fucking-revision-number-7/ http://zerogravity.lisondra.net/fucking-revision-number-7/#comments Tue, 09 Mar 2010 16:32:25 +0000 junlisondra http://zerogravity.lisondra.net/?p=1501

Came across this PDF  i made several years back, as an intro to the 7th revision of a promotional flyer i made for a local agency here. nagtaray na ako kasi naman napaka indecisive ng  boss nila.

Recuerdo ng Digma
2005-July-01, Granada, Nicaragua

Hindi ko alam
kung sino sa dalawang dalampasigan
ang naghatid nitong ulan.
Sinasalo ko ang mga patak,
at ang nagpapaiwan na lamig
sa aking bisig ay may pagsuyo
na kinakabig sa aking gunita
ang recuerdo ng mga nagdaang digma.
Na sa lupang ito, sa mismong lugar,
marahil ay minsang naligaw
sa magkahiwalay na panahon
si Sandino at ang mga frente.
At may putik ang mga paa nilang
lumililim, habang pinatatahimik
ng malakas na buhos ang mga kuliglig.
Kumakabog sa aming dibdib
ang paggulong ng kulog sa himpapawid,
tila pagsabog ng mortar sa kinatatayuang
pumupunit sa katawan. Sa hapag ng nagsalu-salo
naming pananahimik, saglit na papanaog
itong kidlat, at sa malayo, nababanaag
namin ang anino ng Mombacho: nakanganga
at walang pagtanggi na inaako ng sikmura,
ang luha ng langit para sa kanyang mga inilibing
na mandirigma.

Eto ang original pic/postcard na nabili ko sa Nicaragua. Sa akin, powerful ang image na ito dahil sa juxtaposition ng AK47, ang batang pinapasuso, at ang kanyang ngiti. Divah? Ang usual norm kasi:

• may hawak na baril tapos labas ang litid na sumisigaw habang nakataas ang kamao
• nahihiya na nagpapasuso ng anak at may background ng magagandang kawayan, palayan, batis o kalabaw  sa likuran.
• nakangiti at nakataas ang dalawang kamay na kapwa may peace-sign sa mga daliri na malapit sa pisngi

Kaya hayun.

Konting backgrounder:  Ang Frente Sandinista de Liberación Nacional (FSLN) ay isang political party sa Nicaragua na lumaban sa Somoza dictatorship (na naka-tandem  pa ng mga CIA-supported Contras) noong 80’s kung saan libo-libo ang namatay. Ang mga miyembro nila ay tinatawag na Sandinista. Nanggaling ang pangalan nila kay  Augusto César Sandino na una nang nakipag-umbagan sa mga Kano noong 1930s.

Isang privilege rin na nagkaroon kami ng co-worker na dating Sandinista helicopter pilot sa  Nicaragua. Hindi siya marunong mag-ingles pero marunong siyang mag-Ruso kasi sa Russia siya pinadala para mag-training. Yung line sa itaas na “pagsabog ng mortar sa kinatatayuang/ pumupunit sa katawan” ay hango sa kanyang personal na kuwento, dahilan kung bakit nagkadiperensiya sa pandinig ang isa niyang teynga. Kaya lang nagkaroon sila ng LQ  ng kapatid ni Daniel Ortega na head noon ng Sandinista army. Sa bagay, marami sa mga Nicaraguans na nakausap ko ay nawalan na ng crush kay Ortega kasi di raw siya nakapag-deliver ng mga pineksman-peksman nila noon and all nung nakikipagratratan pa sila sa mga army ni Somoza at mga Contra.

Anyways, eto pa ang ilang Sandinista pics ko sa  Nicaragua. Isang mapagpalayang araw sa mga kawomenan, rakenrol!

Am having a Facebook leave, and  I’m at a loss why. It must be the coffee I sipped the other day, the nameless street corner I turned to on my way home from Mount Carmel, or the random choreography of clouds obstructing my sun in high noon. There’s no telling how these external manifestations could affect my internal body chemistry.

I am having a Facebook leave, and while at it, I am attempting  to rediscover comfort from the ordinary: the carbon footprints that liter my desktop, books half-read and unread, two copper rings skinned with silver the first time I embraced them, synthetic action figures housing ancient lusts and jutsus. I am relearning the sound of their names, their substance, their forms. I am feeling them the way a friend from Tagbilaran taught me how to listen and talk  to trees twelve years ago —  ”Keep your eyes  shut and your ears alert, bar all the other noise. Silence your heart beat and amplify the faint grumbling of the trees. Hear them talk. Feel them, talk.”

I was submitting  my self to the musings and geometries  of my graphite pens when the spontaneous thought of  origami cranes fluttered and rested on my lap like some melodies  of a forgotten song, some warmth of a forgotten  kiss. As always without uttering a single word, I started folding and creasing the closest inanimate sheet  within my reach, and after asking my self what brought me to these spaced crossroads of silences, I breathed life to my feathered friend.

This is Aishiteru, she’s my first origami crane,  she suffers from periodic mood swings, she’s towering with ego, she has no capacity to love, she owns Hattori Hanzo’s sword, she’s 80% bitchy,  she hates shit heads, and I love her.

Unknown to everyone, Joybz has a tatoo of my name and my face on her back. She had it done while she was still working in Manila and surprised me the day she came and we made love and I started exploring  her nape and I noticed the tatoo and then I screamed so loud  it awoke the two kids in the other room, and our neighbors all together — “tangina ba’t may tatoo ka ng pangalan ng ex boyfriend mo?” To which she called me an idiot, and insisted that it was me, and not his ex who was also named “Jun”.

She said it was her expression of love to me after I lied to  her that the Chinese thingy tatooed on my chest was the Chinese equivalent of  ”joy” and not “fried chicken” as what most of my friends think.

I told her I don’t buy her explanation, and that I will only be pacified if she’ll have my complete name tattooed on her back: “Hermogenes Fernandez Lisondra Jr.” in thick old gothic font, and expressed my protest by eating as much fats and carbohydrates. She said I was crazy. But after six months and my weight tripled, she finally  gave in and had her back tattooed with my name.

She’s so sweet!

I will have a break from sketching after this, and will resume on March.

Lorna was my classmate from elementary to high school yet I know so little good thing about her. She was a badass kid, wore Prada at such a young age and expresses so by having red socks for her fashion statement  all through out the school year (she’s the one on the extreme right of front row  below).

We used to  bully each other as kindergartens. I would break her crayons, and she would  spill the Tang juice my nanay prepared for my snack;  I will push her while we’re on line, and she would kick my knees when she gets up; she would chase me around the campus and pinch my ears and sides  so excruciatingly hard when she catches me and I would bite her arm until it bleeds; she will bring a tirador to our school and use that to target shoot my ass, and i’d bring bows and arrows to target shoot her forehead.

The only good memories I had of her  were  during fiestas, when our baranggay  holds the annual basketball league , and their zone would come to watch their players. The basketball  court was  just accross the street in front of our house.  And because it was March, and March is the season of mangoes, and we had three indian mango trees abundant with fruits,  she’d always crash to our gate (through it or over it) even though she is not welcome.  She will introduce her self to my lolo as “classmate po ako ni Hermo,” followed by “eyngi po ako ng mangga niyo”.

Because she looked cute and wore pink dress, white shoes and red socks, my lolo would allow her. And to the indian mango trees she’d went; does her monkey swings from branch to branch devouring as much mangoes as she can. My lolo had always forbidden me to climb the trees so i’d stay on the ground and watch her up. Seeing me half mad, and half envious, she’d throw a fruit or two to me, instructing me to “catch mo hermo!” and will call me “engot!” when I miss and I’d yell back  ”mas engot ka! dito mo kasi ibalibag hindi doon!” . Then  I will eat my share of mangoes down below as she does her elegant monkey tricks at the branches above.

TOP: Her original photo which i personally took during our 2006 Alumni Homecoming

Nag-alangan at nahihiya akong i-sketch si Pambie nung  una pa lang kasi naman, ang jowa niya ay isang sikat na pintor. Kaya lang, privilege talaga ang maging modelo si Pambie mapa-drawing man o mapa-photography kaya go pa rin ako. Una,  dahil mataray ang kilay niya. Pangalawa, dahil ang galing niyang magsuot ng tsinelas. Pangatlo, dahil hindi siya hiphop.

Yung iba pang dahilan ay hindi na mahalaga kaya pwede nang i-dismiss: abogada siya, manunulat, bi-lingual poet, biyulinista.

Badge of honor si Pambie sa isang Facebook account, wag lang niyang tatawagin ng “sir” ang mas senior sa kanya. Dahilan para i-confront ko siya, sabi ko ano ka ba? nakakahiya sa mga dati kong katrabaho sa NGO na ang tingin ay very corporate ang pantawag na “sir”. Mula noon ay tinawag na niya akong “kosa”. Isipin niyo, dinemote niya ako mula sa isang corporate label papunta sa isang inmate?

Sinulat niya ang uber-cool na tula sa ibaba:

KANINA, SA TREN

nagpanggap tayong estranghero
‘di tayo nagtabi sa upuan
mukha sa mukha, kuko sa kuko
estranghero sa liiit ng espasyo
nais kong magsipaan tayo.

mula rito, sinilip ko ang iyong anino
sa bintana, sa riles, sa mga ilaw sa gusali,
sa iyong antipara

kumindat ka.
tumingin ang mga tao.

ngumuso ako.
lalong tumingin ang mga tao.
iniisip siguro nila kung magkaanu-ano tayo
anak kaya?
ahhh, sabi ko na nga ba kerida!

haha! mas gusto ko ‘ata yung huli.
masarap man- trip sa mga
mapanghusgang estranghero.

gusto kong magtaka sila
gusto kong magtaka ang mundo
tinabihan kita sabay mutawing:
“bakit ‘di mo pinakasalan ang nanay ko?”

tingin ulit sila.

at nung paalis na ako,
hinalikan kita sabay sabing:
“kita tayo ulit sa ilalim ng kubrekama.”

siyempre, tumingin ulit sila.

buti pa ang mga bintana,
nakita nila ang kislap sa kindat
ng ating mga mata.

masarap talagang mang-trip

sa mga mapanghusgang estranghero.

“salamat sa pagsakay sa tren patungong legarda,
isang balahurang gabi sa inyong lahat.”

TOP: Original Picture

TOP: Initial outlines drawn using Staedler HB graphite pencils. To here, all the sketching processes are done manually with the help of chicken soup.

TOP: Photoshop post-processing to correct the alignment of the facial parts using layers, cut and paste, and raw genius. Darkening and lightening are done using Burn and Dodge tools. Eh ano kung pinotoshop ko? Gusto niyo suntukan tayo?

At hindi ko sasabihin sa inyo ang photoshop procedures ko.

I met Abeeh online sometime in 2005, and I can’t exactly recall  how.  Must have been via Friendster, through a common friend whom I also could not recall.  My friend was into Kung Fu I think.  But I could not  remember who it was  because half of my friends are into Kung Fu. Abeeh  was I think still in Baguio, taking some course which I also could not recall. She could be majoring in Philosophy, or perhaps it was Psychology …  or,  I don’t know. I remember us talking about projections and the other defense mechanisms and all back then, so … ewan, Kung Fu? Perhaps?Yep, Kung Fu it was.  I think she was studying Kung Fu in Baguio.

What got stuck in my mind though was her face, which — having the qualities us portrait photographers  look for  — could (warning: cliche coming ahead) easily stand out above the crowd.

Anyhow, we were able to establish very irregular communications since then, even after she left Baguio and moved to Manila and study Hexadecimal Math and Ninjutsu at UP or Ateneo I think, and her YM avatar would change everytime PAGASA forecasts of a new typhoon coming, and at one time I was like, “What the hell did you do to your hair?” because it looked like someone showered her with corn starch.

After Friendster succumbed to all manners of  jologization (90% of Friendster account holders thought blinking texts and graphics looked cool so they effin filled their profiles and messages with blinking sh@ts and all ), I had no choice but delete my account, crossed the dark side of the force and moved to Facebook where a lot of Mafias, Famers, Pillow Dimwits  and Narcissists thrive … at least FB shared the same disgust on icky profile layouts and am okay with that.

It was here that I got to reunite with Abeeh.

So when the idea of  a Facebook Profile Pic Drawing Project (will somebody suggest a shorter name for this thing?) came to me, her profile pics were among the first potential subjects I wanted to have. And I was not disappointed because among her pics was a black and white portrait that fit my criteria of selection very well.

I repeat, I’m a novice on this craft  and I only have some 98 man-hours of sketching experience through out my whole life. That’s why I had to have several portrait exercises first before I make my attempt on Abeeh’s profile pic.

Actually, the initial drawing looked like Cristina Yang of Grey’s Anatomy.

Thanks to the magic of Wacom Graphic Tablet, my HP scanner (which I had to buy because my old one dropped dead while doing my first scan), and Photoshop post-processing, I was able to do digital surgery to the original drawing and make it as close to Abeeh’s picture on the right.

Again, I meant my sketches to look sketchy as I don’t find the shiny charcoal portraits appealing. That meant I had to employ lots of hatching cross-hatching techniques (those are the criss-crossing lines you’ll see on the close-up shots below). My basic tools here are the Steadler drawing pens (2H, HB, B, 2B, 3B, 4B, 5B, 6B, 7B, 8B) and an eraser. Precise post-processing in the sketch was made possible by the Wacom graphic tablet. Color processing were mostly done using Photoshop’s  Burn and Dodge tool to darken and lighten certain areas. Corrections made on the proportions were done using layers, cutting,  repasting, layer mergin, transformations and lotsa ninja skills.

Again, salamat Abeeh for lending your profile picture.

TOP: Overlay of the original and the sketch. Notice how almost everything align perfectly well. Photoshop layering on post-processing helps so well on solving the problems of proportions on sketching.

I am planning a Facebook Drawing Project, and am starting now with a series of warm ups. The idea is simple, I’ll be selecting several photos of some of my Facebook contacts, and then draw them. Now, I am a novice to drawing, and though I have the pathological tendency to exaggerate things,  my expected outputs for this project are not as big.  They will be sketchy to say the least — I prefer the sketchy feel of pencil drawings compared to the metallic sheens of charcoal drawings — done using the average Staedler drawing pencils, BUT,  my drawings will be definitely  several folds better compared to the comic illustrations of the Power Puff Girls on the Cartoon Network .

My potential photos will need to have the basic qualitites that will make them good materials for hand-drawn portraits:  the proper pose, the eyes that speak of Esperanto, the shapes and geometries of the face that conforms to  (or violates) the Divine proportion, the illusive smile (or the absence of it) ,  and the other X factors that are only perceivable using the 7th sense.

Already, I have now hand-picked several profile photos from some of my contacts and am now in the process of asking their permissions.

I will be posting their drawings here, and the process I went through as I go along.

Am still perfecting some drawing tricks that i’ll be needing for the project. Am still having difficulties with shading, but there are several workarounds to that. I have watched several YouTube tutorials on drawing and gained better  techniques compared to what i have previously developed. As an example, for this exercise, I never started with outlines and guides. Instead, I first worked on her left eye, and moved to the adjacent parts while paying close attention to the proportions. The output proved much better  and the workflow less tedious.

There.

Olrayt, rakenrol.

The photo for this drawing exercise is from Marcelo Montecino. Gracias!

And here’s the YouTube link, share the love, spread the love:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sumWprBHrOg

More of Elmo in love:

Kalatas sa Anak na Nagsisimula pa Lamang Umibig